The Bell epoch

A number of questions come about from the bizarre non-dismissal of Ian Bell at Trent Bridge. The main one is: how hungry was he? He was off for tea like a shot, before anyone else was really aware of what was happening. Was he that determined to beat a hungry-looking Jonathan Trott to the sandwiches? That Trott looks like a man who'd be difficult to shift from a buffet table. Either way, Dhoni/Fletcher's subsequent recalling allows Bell to get away with some grade A fuckwittery while completely emasculating Dhoni, the lily-livered lightweight. You really have to see these things through once you start down that path. Fair enough that he should appeal as we all know wicket-keepers are the biggest set of lying bullshitters* known to man and their word should never be taken without a substantial heap of salt.
Sadly, Bell then failed to be consistent when nicking one to VVS Laxman later on. He could at least have checked for the no-ball.

Personally, I blame Shakoor Rana.


* - Kumar Sangakkara notwithstanding

Ian Bell - an apology

In recent times, this website may have given the impression that England's number six batsman, Ian Bell, was some kind of liability. Headlines such as "Bottler Bell's making our life hell" and "Why is this ginger tosser still being picked?" may have given the impression that we thought the Warwickshire right hander was in some way unsuitable for the rigours of Test cricket.

In light of his last three knocks for his country, we now realise he is not only the most gifted batsman of this and any other generation, but a man of such solid mental character that he can make the strongest and hardest men in the world (Graeme Smith) to a jibbering wreck and we apologise for any misunderstanding caused.

For whom the Bell tolls

Paul Harris is not a great bowler. Yes, he's managed to finagle his way up to ninth in the Test rankings basically by boring people out. He doesn't turn it - once thought of as a rudimentary principle of spin bowling - apart from the odd one that grips, such as the one Paul Collingwood got in the current Test match. If any English players should know about his game plan, it's his former Warwickshire team-mates among which Ian Bell is included.

So why then does Bell stand and watch as a straight-onner crashes into his stumps? It wasn't even close to being a good leave, hitting middle and off about half way up. I've been a big supporter and defender of Bell in the past, but that dismissal was simply diabolical. Park cricketers would be furious with themselves for doing likewise and so it's with heavy heart that I have to agree with what has been received wisdom for some time now and admit that he's got to go. He'll forever be remembered as a nearly man. He still has the ability, but every time he goes out to bat for England now, he looks nervous and opposition bowlers are beginning to see him as a walking wicket. The balance of the side for the first Test in South Africa looked all wrong from the outset and another bowler is needed. Bell has to step aside.