Friday 10 August 2012

The Pietersen principle

Let us begin this with an apology. Below are a number of words about Kevin Pietersen. Sorry.

If you've ever been systematically undermined in your job, you'll know the plan of attack. It's back to your desk, update the CV and get out of there as soon as. That's a little tricky in international cricket. You can't just swan off and go play for someone else (insert your own joke here about international eligibility rules). You're pretty much stuck. If Kevin Pietersen genuinely feels that he's unwelcome in the England environment, he has little option but to reject the Test contract that will be offered to him shortly and become the new Chris Gayle, the pre-reconciled Gayle, a bat for hire in the various t20 leagues around the world.

The question that arises, of course, is whether Pietersen has been systematically undermined or if he's now challenging David Icke as one of the great conspiracy theorists of the age. If Pietersen is really willing to end his England career over a spoof Twitter account, then he really needs to have a look back over his own public pronouncements and develop a bit of self-awareness. We'll stop short of asking for humility as that isn't a quality high on his list of traits and it's absence, in part, makes him the batsman he is, the swaggering, domineering beast who will dictate terms. If this is the end, then we have to hope there's something else at play rather than just the suggestion - strenuously denied - that one of his team-mates is behind the spoof.

If it's glory and adulation Pietersen desires - and he strikes us a man who likes to be told on a regular basis that he's great and how we can't possibly cope without him - then he'll find that without international cricket and the recognition that goes with it, he will struggle to find it playing in the Indian/Bangladesh/Sri Lankan/Zimbabwe Premier League.

If this is the end, England lose their most infuriating and brilliant batsman of this and (m)any other era. His 158 at The Oval in the Ashes of 2005 was as brutal as it comes. By contrast, his dismissal at Cardiff four years later, when he swept a non-spinning Nathan Hauritz off-break from a good two feet outside off to loop a catch up to short leg, was horrible. "That's the way I play", he implored afterwards. Well maybe it bloody well shouldn't be, playing such a low, low percentage shot when well set. Time and again, we'd hear the "That's the way I play" excuse, normally after holing out at long-on when trying to go from 95 to 100 in one shot. And yet that's also why he's endurably watchable, the pyrotechnics and ugly dismissals both making for great television. Without him, England become weaker - that's undeniable. But cricket's unique dichotomy between the team ethic and the individual nature of batsmanship has never been more starkly demonstrated by one person.

But it's worth remembering that the last time Pietersen threw a massive, flouncy strop led to his removal as captain, Peter Moores' dismissal as coach and the arrival of the Strauss/Flower dream team, successive Ashes series wins and the number one ranking. So it's not necessarily a bad thing.

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