ICCynical money grab

Adil Rashid must know how the Irish feel today. A number of times he's shone with bat and ball in ODIs for England only to be dropped for an extra batsman. Ireland's reward for beating Pakistan four years ago and England this time around is to be excluded from the next World Cup.

Of course, it's not Ireland specifically but all associates and affiliates. UAE, Namibia, Canada, Kenya, Afghanistan, Bermuda are all sides that have provided entertainment in World Cups down the years - admittedly not always for the right reasons - as well as Ireland, but the ICC have, in their eternal wisdom, decided that there are more than enough teams wanting to play international cricket and that'll do us nicely thank you.

Instead of an actual World Cup, we'll be having Champions Trophies from now on. Yes, there's a sop to expanding the game for the 2019 tournament with the promise of a qualification period, but what state will the associates be in by then? Ireland made the choice to withdraw from the English county scene and go their own way. Having been granted full ODI status after the 2007 World Cup, the extra funding they receive from the ICC enabled them to pay some of their players within their domestic structure and organise ODI series against full members. Without the chance to play in a World Cup for eight years, the talent drain to England can only increase. After all, what incentive is there for such as George Dockrell to hang about waiting until such time as the ICC deem his nation worthy? If he and others like him are serious about making it as an international cricketer, it's unlikely that the extra T20 places will make any difference to the decisions he makes over the next few years.

If the problem was a bloated tournament with too many dead rubbers, the sacrifice is the wrong one. The tournament just gone could have been massively shrunk by playing two games per day in the group stage and not stringing it out so India could play on weekends to maximise TV audiences. The 2007 format would have been about right had there not been a second group stage - a concept even UEFA did away with eventually - and instead gone straight to knockout as the successful T20 tournaments have done. Even a preliminary round for associates to progress to the main competition would be preferable to complete exclusion.

After getting burned by fancied runners not getting through their group in 2007 - Ireland knocking out Pakistan, Bangladesh seeing to India - the 2011 format was specifically designed to ensure it wouldn't happen again. Obviously the performances of the associates - especially Ireland, Holland to a lesser extent - gave the ICC enough of a fright that it might happen again and TV audiences would suffer as a result. So better than contrive something that stands a remote chance of failure, better to eliminate that as a possibility altogether. It's cyncial and we can all see why they're doing it, but it's not in the interests of cricket and as guardians of the world game, that ought to be their prime motive. This is an old boy's network closing ranks and keeping the spoils for themselves.

So no more John Davison slamfunking a hundred. No more Kevin O'Brien slaughtering the English. No more Dwayne Leverock's amazing catch. No more Ryan ten Doeschate making two hundreds in the tournament, just like Sachin did. No more chance of a fairytale like Afghanistan's attempts to qualify came so close to giving us. No more Sultan Zarawani getting clonked on his unprotected napper. No more use of Balaji Rao's massive thighs to catch a ball. No more Namibian side made up entirely of people called Burger. No more Hiral Patel taking on the best of Shaun Tait. No more Rizwan Cheema. No more Peter Borren and his mad, killers eyes. And shame on you, ICC, for making that so.

ICC Say No to Associates at CWC 2015

I have been struggling to put into words what I think about this decision. But I am hopefully going to sum it up in two.

Utter bollocks.

Here endeth my rant.

World Cup 14 best

Finally we're done and can relax for a bit. But before the IPL starts and the County Championship get underway, here we pick our top 14 World Cup snippets in honour of the last time such a number will appear in the tournament, at least until the ICC pull their collective head out of their collective arse.

14. Best associate

Despite the miserable performances of Canada and Kenya, the other smaller nations were pretty entertaining, especially the Irish who take the nod here for being at worst competitive in every game they played. To get rid smacks of short-termism and a lack of awareness of the game outside it's established centres. To bar the likes of Afghanistan from the tournament is to it's long-term discredit.

13. Shot of the tournament

Step forward 19-year old Hiral Patel.

12. Most sustained assault on a decent bowler

Aided by some miserable leg-stump full tosses, admittedly, but Ross Taylor going absolutely batshit insane against Pakistan was truly astonishing. Also, it only came after our...

11. Best birthday gift

When he was put down twice before he'd made 10 in that innings.

10. Most ridiculous use of the UDRS

This was out. So was this.

9. Best batsman

Virender Sehwag was, as usual, the most exciting, Sachin Tendulkar his usual imperious self, AB de Villiers all dreamy shots around the ground and Jonathan Trott a reliable grinder. And while Tilakaratne Dilshan topped the list with 500 runs, his team-mate and captain Kumar Sangakkara's chanceless 465 at an average of 93 was pure class and he's the one we'd get out of bed at stupid o'clock to watch.

8. Best bowler

Ahead of the semi-final, this writer was heard to comment to a friend of Indian extraction that he fancied Pakistan as they had the better bowlers - Umar Gul and Shahid Afridi. In the end, Zaheer Khan outdid them both and shone in the final to nick the award. Kemar Roach deserves mention too - proper old-fashioned West Indian quick. We hope there are more like him back in the Caribbean.

7. Player of the tournament

Plenty of nominees. Sachin was brilliant, Sehwag explosive, de Villiers all class, Umar Gul, Shahid Afridi and Zaheer Khan all unplayable, Tilakaratne Dilshan and Yuvraj Singh stellar with bat and ball, but we go for Peter Borren because if we don't, he will probably kill us.

6. Most ridiculous scapegoat

Jonathan Trott must have upset Bob Willis in other ways than being an extremely reliable run-scorer to have two 50-plus scores labelled "match-losing innings" by the former England fast bowler turned professional curmudgeon.

5. Best game

It had to be one featuring excitement merchants England. The heart-stopping tie with India swung one way and back the other about five different time during 100 overs. Best game of 50-over cricket? Quite probably, yes.

4. Biggest England implosion

A category with plenty of contenders - the loss to Ireland, to Bangladesh, the stumble against the Dutch - but the clear winner was the sight of eleven hollow shells of men who had been on the road for over six months have their pants pulled down by Sri Lanka. Which leads nicely on to...

3. Most career-defining knock

In the space of 50 balls, Kevin O'Brien made himself a potentially quite rich man, wrote his legend into the history books and helped his country defeat their former colonial overlords with an amazing display of controlled brutality.

2. Best wind-up merchant

Kyle Mills, twelfth man for New Zealand, who came onto the field with the sole intention of letting Faf du Plessis know what he thought of the AB de Villiers run out. And that's a lovely segué to....

1. Biggest choke

Sorry South Africa, but it really was a choke of epic proportions.


And we're done. We can't believe it'll be a whole six days when we get to watch another cricket match - the IPL starts on Friday. The schedulers really need to make sure these enormous hiatuses don't happen like this in the future. Here's hoping the ICC see sense before the next tournament in Australia and New Zealand in four years time and don't exclude the associates and we can enjoy another extravaganza because, for all it's faults, this has been a pretty damn fine tournament.

If the minnows combined

The whole World Cup structure was designed so that the top eight sides would go through and, after a 50-year process and one or two wobbles, that's what has happened. Next time round, there won't be any associate nations and the competition will be all the poorer for it. While they may not have stood much chance of progression through to the latter stages, the associates played their part in raising what could have been a month of utter tedium to something close to interesting. Perhaps if they combined resources, they'd have a real chance of doing something.
Here's what we think a combined side of those not progressing* would look like.

1. Hiral Patel
Opening bat is one area all the associates struggled in, but Canada's Patel flung the bat for an entertaining 50 against Australia and a brisk 30-odd against New Zealand after being overlooked for the first four games which at least showed some potential. The 19-year old didn't look overawed by facing the Aussie quicks - something that can't be said about players much older.

2. Brendan Taylor
Zimbabwe's Taylor had a mixed tournament. A first-baller against Canada was a low point, but he recovered to make 44 in the next game against New Zealand and after Zimbabwe had been flayed by Sri Lanka's opening duo, his quick 80 had you thinking that Zimbabwe might challenge the 328 target. Only briefly, but that's not nothing. Zimbabwe learned during the tournament that they'd been readmitted to the Test ranks and Taylor will benefit from that. He's showed he has the talent and at 25 has time on his side.

3. Tom Cooper
Not the most Dutch sounding of names, but Cooper had a solid tournament. A failure against South Africa isn't a disgrace and by the time he'd made just five against Ireland, the Netherlands were already out. In between, he made a couple of 30s, a 40 and an unbeaten 50 as he was the only Dutch batsman to show any resistance against the West Indies. A consistent performer who chipped in with a few dibbly off-breaks as well.

4. Ryan ten Doeschate
Two hundreds in the competition for the Dutch all-rounder, the first of which helped set up a 290+ chase for England in their opening game. South Africa born and qualifying for England on residency, there were rumblings that both those nations would try and get him on board for the tournament, but he stayed in the orange of the Netherlands and good for them that he did. 307 runs at better than 60, 7 wickets at a slightly expensive 46 is a job well done.

5. Shakib-al-Hasan
Bangladesh captain Shakib would slot right into any other team. He makes vital runs in the lower-middle order and his left-arm spin is incredibly difficult to get off the square. Moreover, he's a shrewd tactician and even after the routing that his side copped from the West Indies, spoke intelligently despite the huge pressure of a vocal home crowd.

6. Kevin O'Brien
He hit a 50-ball hundred against England. Fifty. Wasn't as entrusted with the ball as might have been expected, but still took 4/71 against West Indies. When this tournament is done and dusted though, people will still be talking about that amazing onslaught against the English.

7. Peter Borren
He only has one shot - he attempts to cut everything - but he's a handy late-order hitter and nagging medium pace bowler. The Dutch captain, he marshalled his troops well. Mind, if this writer had mad, scary eyes like that, I reckon I could get people to do my bidding unquestioningly as well.

8. Mushfiqur Rahim
Bangladesh wicketkeeper who knows the rules better than Matt Prior.

9. Shafiul Islam
As with opening batsmen, pace bowling is a department that all the associates struggled with. Shafiul proved more than handy though. He zipped it through at decent rather than express pace and took six wickets at a respectable 34. Only the South Africans tucked into him, taking 44 off his five overs. Nobody else could play him and he was there in that ninth-wicket stand that saw Bangladesh overhaul the English.

10. George Dockrell
In his second World Cup, but not even 19 years old. If that's not living the dream, then I don't know what is. Seven wickets at less than 30 each is good, but his control was good too and his economy rate was under 4.5. That is bloody brilliant. Improving with the bat too.

11. Ray Price
The second man in our XI with the cold, dead eyes of a killer, it says here that Price is 34. That's at least 30 short of where we'd have him, but veteran though he may be, he's still producing the goods. Australia couldn't work him out when he opened the bowling against them which led to some ludicrous claims that the Aussies had taken cash to ensure the first ten overs went for less than a given amount. Rubbish. They just couldn't play Ray Price. As attacking a left-arm spinner as you could wish to see, Price will play an important part of Zimbabwe's second coming as a Test nation.

No Kenyans in there, which tells you all you need to know about how they went at the tournament.

* - Yes, it's a bit of a cheat. You can't make a side from just the associates, so some Zimbabweans and Bangladeshis had to be included.

Associate nation

Non-Test playing country who get routinely spanked in ODI tournaments by the big boys. Except England.